I just applied Icy-Hot balm for the first time in my life. It is really misleading of them to give equal billing to the "Icy" part of the experience.

Current Mood: AAAAAAHHH!

The Proposal
Director: Anne Fletcher
Writer: Pete Chiarelli
Producers: David Hoberman, Todd Lieberman
Stars: Sandra Bullock, Ryan Reynolds, Mary Steenburgen, Craig T. Nelson, Betty White, Denis O’Hare, Malin Akerman, Oscar Nuñez


Well here are two charming people, and that takes you so far. The Proposal is a romantic comedy built on a pile of contrivances, and comes complete with a boatload of easy gags of the falling-down type and the old-woman-says-something-randy type – the old woman is Betty White, and she is also a charming person. But the two people I am talking about are Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds, the former a savvy master in this genre, the latter a youth movie name coming comfortably into manhood here, and matching Ms. Bullock twinkle for twinkle.

What results is a movie that looks good and digests easy; an object lesson in the force-multiplying effect of fixing star charisma in a well-designed housing. At times the scenes and incidents click along with such undisguised efficiency that you can practically see the schematic arrows. It is, to quote one of the characters, “about as subtle as a gun.” But the cumulative effect of two blatantly beautiful people bulls-eyeing one liners, doffing their clothes, and going all jelly-like over each other with some pretty scenery behind them does not need to be subtle; only irresistible.
( … handsome and eligible Andrew making kissy-face with the source of three years’ worth of horror stories. )

Among the sunflowers my brother planted, this eager customer is days ahead of its cousins. Just opened up for its "Hello, world!" today.

"I could not accept for once in my life I had failed."

This amazing, perfect sentence strikes me as the heart of not only the Bernie Madoff case, but potentially all of Wall Street's pernicious influence on the American economy. Bernie Madoff ran a fund resplendent with his personal confidence and willpower. The product he was selling was his own expertise, which was not-inconsiderable to the extent that anyone can actually be an expert investor. Investors didn't know HOW he was providing such great and steady returns, and they didn't want to know. The smarter ones assumed he had insider information and that they could profit by it and never be burned - they assumed he was cheating, but it was okay because the cheating wasn't going to blow back. The others just believed he had The Seer's Gift, and could read numbers like chicken bones. And all the layers of brokers and investment advisers and fund managers who direct the rivers of capital acted as his congregation, singing in great choral unison: "Your money should be with Bernie". And who the hell is average, ignorant Joe 401K to even consider contradicting so many smart people?

You know, out here in crazy, stupid Hollywood we have an expression: "Nobody Knows Anything". Not a single movie that is ever released isn't, at least in part, a gamble. We accept this. And yet Wall Street will never admit to their greatest fear: that it is the same for them. EVERY investment is a gamble. EVERY stock, bond, or fund could fall. EVERY trend could reverse itself, at any time. And yet we're supposed to believe THEY are the smart ones, who act like you can KNOW anything in that chaos?

Bernie Madoff didn't start a pyramid scheme because he was greedy. He went to Wall Street because he was greedy. He started a pyramid scheme because he gambled and lost. He started a pyramid scheme because he has feet of clay, but he subscribed to a religion - The Church of the Promised Twenty Percent Return - that made this a sin. And he thought he was smart enough to hide it. And for over twenty years he was. A smart man indeed. But still a man; a man who gambled.

After 8 days of thrice-daily dog walks around Hollywood, I have done my best to hold on to the daily habit, even without the dog around. Every day I take at least two brief walks, one substantial (read: around two miles) one, or a bike ride; and I am adding back in my morning stretches and WiiFit yoga. Yesterday I did my second significant ride of the week. Both times I went eight miles, which was about my limit strength-wise, but felt little-to-no stiffness or soreness the next day; which means the endurance is there to push further, and very soon.

And this morning, I registered my lowest weight since January.

It's not a big drop, there's a long way to go to get to my weight from last summer, and an even longer way to go to get to where I would like to be; but it's nice to have such an obvious formula confirmed after my struggle to lose weight earlier this year. Want to lose weight faster? BURN MORE CALORIES.

Jogging looks like the champion calorie burner among basic exercises, but with my dodgy knee and no health insurance, I am not sure it is worth the risk, especially since I am clearly making progress with what I'm doing.

And I think that obsessively watching Ninja Warrior on G4 to see what the human body can do is a good motivator.

Moon
Director: Duncan Jones
Writers: Story by Duncan Jones, Screenplay by Nathan Parker
Producers: Stuart Fenegan, Trudie Styler
Stars: Sam Rockwell, Dominique McElligott, Robin Chalk, and featuring the vocal talents of Kevin Spacey


Sam Bell (Sam Rockwell) is a good employee. A little informal, a little temperamental, but he’s dedicated and mechanically-versatile. He copes better with solitude than the average person. You could say he’s uniquely-suited for his challenging job, the lone human aboard a mining station on the dark side of the moon. Even if the giant harvesters collecting fusion super-ingredient Helium-3 are totally automated, and much of the station’s functions are controlled by a relatively-intelligent robot that answers to Gerty (Kevin Spacey, as only he can, voices the semi-mobile computer in tones that are both reassuring and bloodless); unpredictable things happen. That’s entropy – no matter how well-designed your system, chaos gradually creeps in. You need someone who can think on their feet to keep the lucrative product coming.

But even a good employee like Sam Bell can’t do the job forever; he’s been at it for three years, and it’s not polite to say but he’s looking a little pale and wiggy. He’s seeing things out of the corner of his eye and talking to the plants. Moon is a movie about Sam Bell, and the end of his three-year contract, and the less I tell you about what happens the better, except to say that few actors this year will work as hard, and with such mental/emotional dexterity, as Sam Rockwell does in this movie. And also that it was such a rare and happy thrill to be watching a movie where there was no obviously inevitable conclusion. The situation it creates is so ethically novel, so despairingly strange, as to totally lack a “correct” solution under the circumstances. Scene after scene is alive because it is impossible to predict, co-writer/director Duncan Jones has imagined a scenario which is fantastical, but also perfectly logical, if you understand systems and entropy, and corporate bottom-line reasoning on an interstellar body with no particular laws.
( It could be that going a little insane was good for him. )

The Taking of Pelham 123
Director: Tony Scott
Writer: Screenplay by Brian Helgeland, based on the novel by John Godey
Producers: Tony Scott, Steve Tisch, Todd Black, Jason Blumenthal
Stars: Denzel Washington, John Travolta, James Gandolfini, John Turturro, Luis Guzman, Victor Gojcaj, Michael Rispoli, Robert Vataj


Some stories grow into myth through the retelling; others fade into irrelevancy. The Taking of Pelham 123 is a louder, more expensive adaptation of the 1973 potboiler novel about a million-dollar subway hijacking written by the late Morton Freedgood (under his pseudonym John Godey). It first saw dramatic staging in 1974 as a successful mainstream thriller starring Robert Shaw as the kidnapper and Walter Matthau as the dogged blue-collar transit cop trying to figure out his game. 1998 saw a quickly-forgotten cable adaptation pitting Edward James Olmos against Vincent D’Onofrio.

Now here we are on that same luckless train line again, with another gang of thugs seizing a car and demanding $10 Million (inflation at work) from the city of New York in exactly one hour. This time John Travolta leads the black hat crowd, and the hero is beleaguered civil servant Walter Garber – played by Denzel Washington as an overwhelmed man trying his best. Screenwriter Brian Helgeland (Payback, L.A. Confidential) provides authenticity of atmosphere, tasty dialogue for his two leads, and some contemporary window dressing that reflects the new financial reality in America – you think $10 million is where the inflation stops? You haven’t been paying much attention to the numbers that get thrown around on Wall Street.

But what cannot be covered up is that this story is not being re-told because it really says anything about the human condition. It is being re-told because it provides showy movie star roles for two and a ticking clock deadline that snugly fits into movie structure; and the marketing department has to work a little bit less when using a pre-sold title and premise.
( Weren't you supposed to say, 'That's a grocery delivery boy?' )

Adam was in the neighborhood from an event he was moderating at Paramount. Rather than drive home, he just called and swung by. We checked the movie listings, realized that Moon was opening today, which we had both been excited about beyond any outside buzz. So out the door we went.

As we walked over, we passed an open-windowed sidewalk hamburger place, and the smell enticed aggressively. Adam hadn't eaten. He didn't want to eat and walk, I suggested instead that he eat and I walk ahead to secure tickets. He said: "You think that Moon will sell out?"

It IS the Arclight crowd, I countered.

He grinned, because the Arclight is exactly the sort of place where an opening day matinee of Moon sells out. We skipped the burgers.

At the theatre, we saw Quentin Tarantino slipping out of the Cinerama Dome from the early screening of The Taking of Pelham 123. No entourage, no date; a couple of people shook his hand and tried to start conversations, but he kept his feet moving under him and shook them off. Since he appropriated his color-coded naming scheme for the Reservoir Dogs gangsters from the team of hijackers in the first film version, it's natural he'd see this one opening day.

"I'm glad we didn't stop for the chili burger", said Adam on glimpsing one of his idols.

Moon was indeed nearly sold out. Our seats were in the second row from the front. At Arclight, second row from the front is still a really good viewing angle. As we entered, the usher said: "Be sure to stay for the Q&A!", because the co-writer/director of Moon was showing up to answer questions after the 5:20 matinee. Because that's what happens on a day LA decides to be good to you.

The Hangover
Director: Todd Phillips
Writers: Jon Lucas & Scott Moore
Producers: Todd Phillips, Daniel Goldberg
Stars: Bradley Cooper, Ed Helms, Zach Galifianakis, Justin Bartha, Heather Graham, Sasha Barrese, Jeffrey Tambor, Ken Jeong, Rachael Harris, Mike Tyson, Mike Epps


What a thin skin it is, this thing we call civilized behavior. We are capable of so much that is stranger, and more brainless; and it is remarkable how little a push we sometimes need to burst out of our skin and go to that weird glory. The Hangover, one of the funniest movies so far released in 2009, is about that quality in people; more specifically, in men; more specifically still, in guys.

It is a major step forward for comedy director Todd Phillips (Old School), who makes the very smart decision to not film the piece as if it is a comedy. It is bright but not unnaturally so; the blaze of the desert sun and the neon of Vegas set the color palate. He sits back and observes events rather than straining to underline them, and trusts his cast of non-stars to be funny in low key. It has confidence in its look and tempo, and understands that this story is about base instincts, and so its humor is to be mined not directly from its heroes, but from how they respond to the strange reality that has sprung up around them; one where there’s a baby in your hotel suite that wasn’t there the night before, and there could be an armed naked man where you least expect him to be.
( … the inborn urges to drink and screw and steal and fight )